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Fear

By: Michelle Gottlieb, Psy.D., MFT


We have nothing to fear, but fear itself. We are all familiar with this quote. However, it is amazing how much fear itself can stop us from pursuing what we really want. How many times have you thought about doing something and backed out due to fear? It might have been going for a new job, or perhaps asking someone out on a date, or even trying a new food.

Okay, so you have decided to jump into doing new things and no longer have fear be part of the equation. Wait! We have fears for a reason. Fears can keep us from unsafe situations. Fears can literally keep us alive.

So, now you are sitting there saying, “Okay, I need to let go of my fear but my fear is keeping me safe? Dr. Michelle, you are driving me nuts!” When it is time to try new experiences and you begin to be aware of your fears stopping you from moving forward, stop. Take a deep breath. Look at your fears. What, actually, are you afraid of? Are you afraid of failure? Are you afraid of rejection? Or are you really afraid of success? Ask yourself what is the worst thing that could possibly happen and could you handle whatever that might be. You decide to ask someone out, and they coldly refuse. You did not die. You have not been diagnosed with a terminal disease. You had the courage to try something new. You probably learned some new things about yourself and the situation.

Fear can give us that time to decide if what we are about to do is a good decision for us. It can give us the opportunity to see what lessons we have learned from the situation. Once we decide that we are going to move forward, then allow yourself to fully experience whatever it is you are going to do and learn from it.

Don’t let fear stop you from enjoying your life. Don’t let fear stop you from enjoying your journey.

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